Star Wars Opening - changed and improved

"Choose the force. Choose a side, choose a Jedi knight, choose a teacher, choose a fucking big
                    death star, choose star destroyers, blasters, tie-fighters and a light sabre.

                    Choose a black suit, black helmet and boots.

                    Choose a loan from Jabba the Hut. Choose a philosophy.

                    Choose an Emperor. Choose a planet with matching moon. Choose a three planet system in the
                    Dromoda system and fucking enslave them.

                    Choose the Rebels and wondering why the fuck you are kneeling by the Emperor on a Sunday

                    Choose sitting next to that Emperor watching whole planets being enslaved in mind-controlling,
                    force crushing battles, stuffing fucking replacement parts into your body.

                    Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable death star, nothing more
                    than a dictator to the selfish, evil fucked up brats who fight for you.

                    Choose a future.

                    Choose the Force.

                    I chose not to choose the Force.

                    I chose something else... I chose...The Dark Side."